Fade and Focus

“To thine own self be true.” Yup, Shakespeare got it over 400 years ago and some of us still struggle with it today. My concept of Fade and Focus is about knowing yourself, heart and body, and pretty-partying accordingly.

Heart: it’s all about selecting styles that reflect your life style, comfort zone, aesthetic sensibilities as well as that which you aspire to become.

Body: it’s about minimizing and distracting from your larger, puffier areas (fade) and identifying your most attractive areas and putting the spotlight there (focus).

Some women find it difficult to acknowledge their most attractive areas. It isn’t their fault it is the result of a lifetime of media, with the help of Mattel, lauding the virtues of Barbie-doll-proportioned women. Academics from the University of South Australia suggest the likelihood of a woman having Barbie's body shape is one in 100,000. Other reports make Barbie even more unrealistic.

Here’s an exercise I want you to try:

Privately, stand in front of a full-length mirror (dressed is fine.) Emotionally, step outside yourself, stand off to the side and become your best girlfriend, or someone specific, who loves you. From their perspective, tell the person standing in front of the mirror, what her most attractive features are and remind her that she is lovely and you love her. Those are the attributes (face, hair, eyes, skin tone, shoulders, neck, décolletage, arms, hands, legs, etc.) you must trust and highlight!

Here’s a glimpse of Fade and Focus for me in this video. I love my face, hair, décolletage, forearms, hands, legs, ankles and my height. I choose to “fade” my tummy, hips, thighs and upper arms.

Please post - share the attributes that you will be focusing on (spotlighting.) If you’re stuck, post a clear photo and I’ll show you the love you can’t give yourself – yet!

Girlfriends, it is foundational to build your wardrobe by accentuating the positive!

Babe

Vertical Storylines

What do 6 foot, size 2 models and real women like us have in common? We both hang our prettiest silhouette on the longest looking body line possible, the former are born with it and we must create it. And that’s okay, because we can.

Your tallest silhouette hangs on two things.

The line of the outfit:

Keep the silhouette narrow and worn close to the body. Choose soft fabrics that drape. Select tone on tone or monochromatic palettes, and vertically designed details like, seaming, single breasted jackets and zip-front jackets.

The fit of the clothing:

Choose intimates that smooth but don’t restrict. A perennial favorite are the Ulla-la! short panties. They do just that and are a great deal starting at $14. Pick fabrics that are fluid but have enough body to glide and not cling. Ulla’s best selling matte jerseys accomplish this beautifully. Two styles I particularly like are the essential dress starting at only $39 #12233 and angel sleeve jacket #02571 at only $44. Too big or too tight equally compromise your vertical storyline.

You’ve succeeded in creating a vertical storyline if…

• The lines and illusions of this outfit go up and down.
• All items float closely and gently on the body.

Want to telegraph your vertical storyline? Stand up straight, roll your shoulders back, focus your eyes and chin on the subject ahead, smile and think, “Hello world!”

Please share other ways that you telegraph confidence and walk tall!

Babe

Wardrobe Building: A Foundation of Physical and Emotional Comfort

“To be a fashionable woman is to know yourself, know what you represent, and know what works for you. To be ‘in fashion’ could be a disaster on 90% of women. You are not a page out of Vogue.”-Author Unknown

Shopping for plus size women can be either exhausting or exhilarating – the choice is yours. To make it fun and productive, I suggest three things:

• Develop a Pretty Party Portfolio
• Inventory your closet ruthlessly
• Develop a shopping plan

A Pretty Party Portfolio is a plastic accordion envelope with 12 compartments. This becomes the place where you identify and organize your wish list. Each time you come across something that intrigues you from a magazine or catalog, cut it out and put it in the correct section (tops, bottoms, dresses, jackets, footwear, jewelry, handbags, etc.). While you may not purchase the specific item you’ve identified, often you can replicate the style or feature that is appealing in an item that is appropriate for you. This is how you inform and inspire yourself before shopping, and get real bang for your buck!

Next, inventory your closet. If you haven’t worn it in a year or more, repair, donate or trash it. If an item is attractive but not right for you for any reason, physical or emotional, let it go, make room for the things you love and will wear. I’ve heard it said that women do NOT wear between 70-80% of what’s in their closet.

From what remains in your closet, put together several outfits, carefully identify a shopping plan based on what is missing to make the outfit complete and in ready-to-walk-out-the-door condition. Start a list or use the Essential Inventory Card, shown here and referred to in my book, Pretty Plus. You need at least two go-to outfits for every occasion of your lifestyle. This is the beginning of developing a shopping plan and building a wardrobe that works for YOU!

Please help me start a conversation here by commenting on:

My fashion wants and needs are…

Babe

Body Frames: A Balancing Act

The inimitable Coco Chanel said “Fashion is architecture: it’s a matter of proportions,” so while my size (and budget) bars Chanel labels from my closet; Chanel wisdom thrives there. Proportion is about understanding your body frame, leading to my concept of Fade and Focus which will help you pick flattering, fashionable items every time you shop.

Your frame is the basic shape of your body, the size of one body part compared to others, regardless of how much you weigh. Did you know that your body frame can be likened to the shape of a diamond? So, why not call yourself, “a round diamond?” I do.

Pear Shape Diamond

Smaller through the arms, shoulders and breasts, however, has wider hips, tush, thighs and calves.

Balance wide hips by inserting a small shoulder pad your top.

Heart Shape Diamond

Broad and full through the arms, shoulders and ribcage, however, narrows through the hips, thighs, and legs.

Use dark, muted colors on top and bold shades or patterns on the bottom.

Marquise Shape Diamond

Thinner arms, shoulders, hips, tush and legs, however, has a full tummy.

Wear tops that are fitted through the arms and shoulders and fall into an A-line - interesting patterns through the tummy can actually distract from puffiness.

Round Shape Diamond

Round and full through the arms, shoulders, back, tummy, hips and thighs, however, has a noticeable waist and shapely legs. If you’re confused about which diamond shape you are – if you’re curvy but proportionate - and have a waist, this is your frame.

Wear dresses and skirts that hit the bottom of your knee to show off shapely legs.

Emerald Shape Diamond

Wide and full from the shoulders and arms through the hips, thighs and legs and has no appreciable indentation at the waist. If you’re confused about your frame – and you’re proportionate but straight up and down, this is your frame.

Wear items that that have gentle curvy lines embedded through cut or pattern.

Stop hiding behind your clothes. Wear sleeker items where you can to promote a shapely, smart silhouette. Not being aware of your shape causes the biggest mistakes and wastes money. Knowing which diamond you are, however, is the beginning of manufacturing the silhouette you seek, consistently.

If you’re still unsure, Ask Babe…”Am I a marquise or a round shape diamond?”

Send in photos of yourself, which I’ll post on the site to help you and others determine your diamond, and I’ll suggest some styles that will complement too!

Babe